Soul Magnetism

I took my first intentional (kind of) rest day on Monday [and was a semi GMF (grumpy mother fucker)]. The time before being months prior, and forced on me via a car & bike accident. It reminded me of how important rest is.

My body’s been communicating with me via niggles and I really don’t feel like ignoring them such that I’m forced to abide by a scream.

Listen to the whispers

So my “fasted” morning 4am ride is feeling super ick: everything from how I plan my day around it to the way my body’s feeling are “ick”. It’s not helping me get my period back (RED-S), but I do understand that it’s helping parts of me feel subdued (this is why therapy is important).

So a small shift today, after waking up hungry, was to cut 10 mins and add them to the post-breakfast ride. And that ride always feel like I’ve got more power and strength.

Power and strength. Those feel like good shit.

So the difference in this experience is that I recognized in my body that there was feeling guiding me: from ick, to power and strength.

Clusterfuck of Feels

Dissociative coping via numbing: exercise training & underrecovery 👉🏻 rib spasm 👉🏻 pain-avoidance by eating less & training more 👉🏻 knee pain now.

When. The. Body. Says. (Fucking) NO.

First rest day in months- since the last time my rib went out because of the exact same cycle as above.

Woke up at my regular 4am, put in non-biking clothes, drank warm water then coffee then headlamp-walked an hour.

Physio later.

Appropriate song for now:

What I’m interested in lately:

Here’s a compilation of some things catching my attention lately:

1. Nasal breathing and training and Life:

2. Gray Cook and Functional Movement Screening:

“Make it challenging, not difficult.

Reflex-stability: distraction and compression for hips and shoulders are probably going to give you more reflex stabilization then rehearsing reps with the stabilizer muscles, because they’re going to send out a global signal for alignment and integrity.”

3. CPTSD & Psychotherapist Pete Walker:

4. Lawrence Van Lingen: chiro & natural movement & breath cool dude runner Ironman works with Rinny Carfrae & Ryan Sandes ✊🏻

5. Craig Liebenson and First Principles of Movement:

Slow Shifts

I begin by entertaining the idea of change. Slowly “pendulating” between the safety inside the formed coping mechanism, and where I want to be.

A concrete example for me is switching my fasted AM bike to not fasted. Maybe later in the day.

I start by just observing and scanning in my body what feelings arise as I consider the switch. And then I back off and remember I am not actually doing it yet, and return to where I know I can do my fasted ride. And then I repeat, “pendulating” again.

Step uno.